"Thank you for calling Sallini.com".

"If you wish to leave a message for Tarek, please press 1. If you wish to leave a message for Mark, please press 2. If it's Spiro you're calling, please press 3.

"If none of these names make any sense to you, you've probably called the wrong number. In that case, please press 4 and leave a message for Vix!, he's feeling ignored."