submitted by Claude
Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by St. Peter.
"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I`m not sure whether to
send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by
putting a computer in almost every home, yet you also created that ghastly Windows 95. I`m going to do something I`ve never done
before in your case; I`m going to let you decide where you want to go."
Bill replied, "well, what's the difference between the two?"
St. Peter said, "I`m willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision."
"Fine, but where should I go first?"
"I`ll leave that up to you."
"Okay then," said Bill, "Let`s try Hell first."
So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear
waters and lots of bikini-clad women running around, playing in the
water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining; the
temperature perfect. He was very pleased.
"This is great!" he told St. Peter. "If this is hell, I really want to see heaven!"
"Fine," said St. Peter, and off they went.
Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell.
Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision.
"Hmmm. I think I`d prefer Hell," he told St. Peter.
"Fine," retorted St. Peter, "as you desire."
So Bill Gates went to Hell.
Two weeks later, St. Peter decided to check on the late billionaire to
see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill, shackled
to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves, being burned and
tortured by demons.
"How's everything going?" he asked Bill.
Bill responded, with his voice filled with anguish and disappointment,
"this is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I
can`t believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with
the beautiful beaches, the scantily-clad women playing in the water?!???
"That was a demo," replied St. Peter.
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