WOMEN vs. LIFE
submitted by Dany!

Q: Why are hurricanes normally named after women ?
A: When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with the them.

Q: What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
A. You can unscrew a light bulb.

Q: Why do women close their eyes during sex ?
A: They can't stand seeing a man have a good time.

Q: How do you make your wife scream for an hour after sex ?
A: Wipe your dick on the curtains.

Q: Why do men die before their wives?
A: They want to.

Q: What do you do with 365 used condoms?
A: Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q: What's the speed limit of sex?
A: 68; at 69 you have to turn around.

Q: Why girls rub their eyes when they getup in the morning?
A: They don't have balls to scratch.